Empowered Children

The following is taken from Scott Noelle's fabulous site "Enjoyparenting.com". I subscribe to his Daily Groove and can attest to the fact that is truly grounds me in to the parent I strive to be.

The Daily Groove
The Roots of Violence
by Scott Noelle, posted on 2007-04-17
Nothing is more natural than for a child to become angry when his or her intention is thwarted. Anger is a reaction to perceived entrapment or disempowerment; it activates the body's primal energies for restoring freedom and personal power. These energies can be applied violently... or creatively.

But when anger itself is thwarted — when those energies are successfully suppressed via threats of punishment, withdrawal, or exclusion — the child will descend into hopelessness (relative to the original intention, if not generally). The child may then appear "well-adjusted," but those energies persist, like a sleeping volcano, increasing the potential for extreme violence.

So when you empower children rather than thwarting them, you make the world a less violent, more peaceful place. However, it gets tricky when parents think they have to thwart themselves to empower their children, as that can awaken their own raging volcanoes.

Today, look for ways to experience power with your child. Be creative. Think outside the box. Give as much as you can and still feel good. And remember that you are not the ultimate Source of your child's power.



This got me to thinking, about the boiling point that arises with in me, when I come head to head with my children's determination to get their needs met. The shift for me, just today, is realizing, in those moments it is not about them at all!! They are perfectly going about getting just what the need/want in the moment. I am struggling with the little girl inside of me, who figured out very early on in life, that she was best to just shut up and behave. So, when my boys are striving to have it all, be it all in this BIG world that wants them to be small, that little girl inside of me, uses my big adult body to try and get a little power back, to have a chance to be the boss. It really comes down to .... well a temper tantrum I am having. What now I wonder? Could it be as simple as healing my own inner child, through embracing my children with the truth of abundance and the opportunity to continually feel empowered. Oh ya and creating a space to go away and throw those temper tantrums in a way that is releasing, with out harm to others.